East Coast vs. West Coast

east coast
The boring ol’ East Coast

Being from New England, I’ve always been a huge fan of the east coast. There’s something about having the ocean at your doorstep that those living in the center of the USA don’t get to see very often.

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The Majestic West Coast

However after getting a look at a recently updated map of the west coast, it appears to be a place I’d be much more comfortable.

 

True Revenge: “He Stole My Girlfriend, So I Stole His Job!”

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Jealousy at Wally World

by Paul Durkin (names have been changed to protect the innocent)

Of course, when I speak of Wally World, I’m not referring to the fake amusement park in the Vacation movie. I’m talking about that really big retail chain, where you buy your socks and underwear. You know the place right?

I worked in the Electronics Department and had been dating Jolene, (one of the cashiers) for about 6 months. At 19, she was a year older than me, but we had a good thing. We both enjoyed the same TV shows, (The Walking Dead and Game of Thrones), the same food (pizza and spaghetti) and we would hook up on the weekends and play video games at my house. My parents liked her, too. She’s what your mom would call a good girl and she was well-liked at the store by the other employees and the managers.

Walmart

The Douche Bag Arrives

Things were pretty good between Jo and I until 6 weeks ago. That’s when the douchebag started working. His name was Evan. I fucking hate that name and I hated him right from the get go. Evan was hired as an assistant manager. What a dickweed. Right from the start, the girls were falling all over this guy. They said he looked like Channing Tatum, although I didn’t see it. That’s not what pissed me off. I’m better looking than Evan, but he’s got 8 years on me and his assistant manager status put me out of his league immediately. There are some pretty good looking girls in my store. Evan probably could have had any one of them, but he decided to go after Jolene. No one takes my girl and gets away with it. Evan would soon find that out.

McDonald's

She Began Cheating Almost Immediately

After 6 months with her, I didn’t think Jolene would cheat on me. She didn’t seem the type. I don’t know what kind of cologne douchey Evan wore, or what kind of lines he was feeding her, but I picked up on the cheating signals almost immediately.

None of the managers were Facebook friends with any of the hourly peons. Jolene, however had friended Evan. I noticed it about two weeks after he started at the store. Fortunately my name was still in the coveted relationship spot. I know what you’re thinking. Why didn’t I confront her right away? I didn’t have any evidence, that’s why. If I was going to catch her, it was going to be good.

The second sign that something was wrong, was when my friend Roth (a nickname he picked up for his love of the original Van Halen), who worked in the grocery department met up with me for lunch and told me that he had seen Evan and Jolene together at McDonald’s in the morning having breakfast before work. Even that was shitty evidence. I’ve always gotten McDonald’s with people from work-even other girls. It wasn’t a big deal. Most of us were friends with each other at the store. I didn’t want to be an asshole and accuse her of cheating, just because she went to McDonald’s with some guy. That’s just fucking stupid. Sure, I was jealous, but I didn’t want her to know it. Jolene had been with me the night before until midnight, so I wasn’t worried about a breakfast with some guy she worked for.

Another sign she may have been cheating, was the fact that she would bring up Evan in conversation with me a few times when we saw each other and talked about work.

“Evan said the funniest thing to a customer today” or “Evan caught a shoplifter today while Loss Prevention were sleeping in the office.”

When a girl starts mentioning a guy more than a few times in a night, it’s pretty obvious she has a thing for him. It was time to find out for sure.

Busted!

Funny, but the night I caught her cheating was the night we had the best sex ever. She was at my place until about 10pm and told me she had to leave because she had an early shift the next day, which was true, because I checked her work schedule before I left.

As she drove off, I jumped in my mom’s car and followed her from a distance. She only drove a few streets over. Right to fucking Walmart, where her new boyfriend Evan was working that night until 11pm. Oh, I had checked his schedule, too.

They stood outside Jolene’s car and embraced, kissed and then he got in her car and they drove off. I followed them for 5 or 6 blocks, before losing them at a stoplight. I didn’t want to know anymore than I did. I had seen enough.

revenge

 

Revenge is a dish best served cold, but as pissed off as I was at Jolene, I still loved her. My revenge was going to be on Evan. I had to remove the cause, not the symptom. I didn’t know what I was going to do and I didn’t want to strike right away and get either of them suspicious, so I decided to wait a few weeks.

About 5 weeks later, (living a semi normal love life with Jolene), I was taking my money bag (the money from the cash register at the end of my shift) to the office, where I figured out my revenge almost immediately.

Evan had a small canvas bag he kept in the office with his shit inside, (a spare work shirt, his paperwork, stuff like that. The managers were required to keep things like handbags and knapsacks in the office at all times, per the Loss Prevention Department. I had to get to Evan’s bag.

Once I handed my bag to the cash lady, she went into the inner office where they kept the money and I was alone in the office. On one of the shelves was a $50 video game. No one was supposed to have merchandise in the office, but the managers would usually bring in stuff they were going to buy  at the end of their shift. I grabbed it and quickly shoved it into Evan’s bag,

Not fully satisfied,  I looked around and saw a strip of those white sticky things that the security people put on razor blades and Tylenol and stuff, so the alarm goes off when they leave the store. I grabbed the whole strip and slipped it into one of the pockets of Evan’s fucking ugly bag and then I went home. I was exhausted. I feel asleep by 9pm, missing all of Jolene’s 4 phone calls, calls from Roth and 1 from the store manager about a mandatory meeting the following afternoon at 2pm. My phone had exploded overnight. Facebook, too. 16 messages overnight. Fucking news in retail stores travels fast.

fcck_yeah

Here’s what I got from Roth:

Evan leaves the store at 10pm and the fucking EAS system (the door alarms) light up like a Christmas tree. Loud beeping and everything. The whole shebang. The LP guy was at the jewelry department and came over and asked Evan to walk through a second time, (which is procedure), as sometimes these towers sound off for no good reason. He goes through again and the same thing. Lights, bells whistles, etc. LP asked him to check his pockets to see if he had accidentally put some spare tags in his pocket while he was working, (which happens all the fucking time) and there was nothing. Then LP asked him to open his bag, It’s a rare thing for LP to bag check a manager, but since he knew he didn’t steal anything, he gladly opened it, revealing the stolen video game. Evan was brought back to the Loss Prevention office and the store manager had to get out of bed and come down to the store. I heard he was beyond pissed!

The Payoff

To make a long story short (I apologize for the length of this article, but I didn’t want to leave anything out),  Evan was able to resign and leave that night. No one believed his story about being set up. They found the strip of security tags in his bag, which he claims “proves he was set up”, but no one cared. Retail is a cruel business. There’s always someone waiting to take your place. The store manager didn’t think it was in the best interest of the store to prosecute. (Although some companies like to send their shoplifting employees out of the store in cuffs as an example to other would be thieves, some don’t want to be listed in the local Police Log section of the local newspaper and gain that kind of publicity, so my store manager swept it under the rug.

The Aftermath

Well, Evan is gone. So is Jolene, for that matter. She got up and quit as soon as she started being questioned by the manager and LP about her relationship with Evan. She’s attempted to call me at least 100 times, but I refuse to take her calls, or call her back. Weeks later she’s still calling the house, but all that’s doing is pissing off my parents. She’ll eventually get the hint.

The moral of the story is: Don’t fuck other people. Your life could be destroyed.

Note: Our True Revenge Stories from our readers are published for entertainment purposes only. Only a fool would believe them and we discourage our readers from trying any of the tactics included in these stories.
Send your True Revenge Tales to Prettywasted.com today!

 

 

 

 

 

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Funny, Sexy, NSFW Links for July 27, 2015

Luna the Great Moon Goddess
Luna the Great Moon Goddess

 Your Monday Hotlinks

She’s Hot, but the Outfit is Ridiculous

Do Women Fart?

When Alcohol Attacks

Best Photobombs Ever

Time for a Workout!

Mad Twerking

You Laugh, You Lose!

These Shirts Should Be Illegal

That Must Have Been Some Casserole Last Night

Here’s Something to Rave About

I Loved Her Long Before the Vacation Movie

“Ready for my big date and I know I forgot to so something…..!”

 

 

 

Model: Luna the Great Moon Goddess

Check Out Train Wreck and Follow Our Facebook, Too!

Just got this sexy selfie from Train Wreck, who (if you didn’t know by now) is back at Prettywasted.com with her ever-popular hot selfie pics. This one is HOT off the camera and TW was nice enough to include her own caption.

train wreck from Prettywasted.com“Train wreck is back bitches!!!!”-Train Wreck

As you can tell, she doesn’t waste anytime making her presence known. And why should she? She’s right at home here on the site 6 years after making her debut appearance.

Prettywasted.com owner, Joe James says of Train Wreck:

“She’s that seriously pretty girl next door you’d love to sit down and have a beer with. But, she’s also the girl who would fuck up your shit if you got out of line.”-

Look for more Train Wreck right here on Prettywasted.com.

Follow Our Facebook

As we bounce the site back up to where it used to be, our Facebook needs a transfusion of new users. Prettywasted Facebook followers not only get the new pics first, but also announcements, model news and other fun stuff you won’t find on the site.

Click Here and follow our Facebook

 

 

Are You Following Jessica Rabbit on Facebook? You Should Be!

Jessica Rabbit on FacebookJessica Rabbit

This is one of the hottest and most fun Facebook model pages I’ve ever visited. Jessica Rabbit’s Fan Page is more than a modeling page. It’s a mishmash of awesomeness (and kickass pro modeling pics) put together by internationally published alternative model, Jessica Rabbit.

If you’ve never heard of Jessica Rabbit, don’t feel bad. I didn’t know who she was either. I’ve been out of the modeling business (websites and promotion) for a couple of years now, so I haven’t been privy to some of the newer talent on the internet. While updating our own Facebook page, I happened to notice Jessica Rabbit’s page was “recommended to me” by Facebook. I’m glad I took a peek.

Jessica Rabbit has a boatload of modeling credits, she’s more than happy to share with her fans. She’s a Texas Inked Girl, a Dirty Shirty Girl and a member of the Inked Army. Aside from her insane good looks, (easily seen in the many, many pro and self shot photos in her albums), you’ll find she’s pretty much the normal girl next door. I’m going to take a guess right here and say that’s one of the keys to her HUGE popularity on Facebook.

This is much more than a modeling page

Although Jessica has loaded her page to the brim with her modeling photos, (much to the delight of her massive audience of 1,189,157 fans), she also links to websites and articles of things she likes, as well as things she knows her fans will enjoy. This to me, is what sets her apart from the sometimes egotistical, “ME! ME! ME!” mentality, most modeling pages seem to follow.

From a page linking to still photos of the hilarious escapades of a Walmart employee, named Shane, to a photo pictorial about Why You Must Visit Brazil if You’re a Single Man, to a video with her just being a silly ass in the car, Jessica Rabbit’s page seems to have it all.

Follow the Jessica Rabbit Facebook page today and tell her you heard about it on Prettywasted.com/ We’re definite fans!

You can also check out Jessica Rabbit’s Modeling Site for MORE Hot Pics and Prints.

Stay with us for MORE Facebook Pages you should be following!

Prettywasted Model: Train Wreck

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Train Wreck Returns

Great news for an otherwise uneventful day! One of my personal favorites, Train Wreck is back and returning to Prettywasted.com to model.

This transplanted California Girl, (now braving the cold and mountains in Colorado) is not only a major traffic magnet for this website, but a guaranteed traffic accident for anyone who leers while she’s walking down the street.

Long time fans will no doubt remember this 6 time “Prettywasted Woody of the Week Winner”, so while TW takes some sexy selfies, I’ve gathered a few of my personal favorites, so new fans can check out this Prettywasted hottie.

 

True Revenge: The Punk Rocker and the Rednecks

cropped-419446_10150670756332236_1937634821_n1.jpgPrettywasted True Revenge Stories

“Dax, let’s get out here”, she said. “You need a doctor. It looks like you’re bleeding.”

A PRETTYWASTED EXCLUSIVE

There were 4 of them and only one of me, How could I possibly kick their asses? There was no way…except to use old fashioned genius. Did I have it in me? Was I creative enough?  And most-importantly, was I man enough?”

I was 19 and about to pick up Sue to go see a movie. Sue was a year younger, 5’3″ and GORGEOUS! It didn’t matter what movie, but seeing as this was the early 80’s, assume it was a dumb movie, or worse, something with Molly Ringwald. I was with my Suzie and the world was good. We’d been going out over a year and I was really crazy,nuts, insane in love with her.

It was mid summer in Southern New England and the weather was horrid. High 90’s and EXTREMELY humid. The air conditioning wasn’t working in my 78′ Plymouth Volare (ok, I’ll give you time to stop laughing)  so all 4 (yes, 4) windows in the car were down. I was a huge Ramones freak back then and the cassette deck was always blasting their music. I had to turn it down when I pulled onto Suzie’s street, because her dad used to get pissed off that I was upsetting the neighbors or something. Her parents didn’t like me. Maybe it was the long, spikey hair, maybe it was the tight skinny levis and Converse sneakers I always wore, or maybe it was the fact that I was in the backseat groping their precious daughter every chance I got. Whatever the reason, they didn’t care for me one bit. But, I digress.

On the way to the cinema,  Suzie opened up her bag and started rolling one for the ride. She rarely smoked pot, but she was never without it.  She was one of those chicks who could roll a joint with one hand-while smoking a cigarette. I was never that coordinated. She lit it, took a satisfying hit and then passed it to me. The radio was blasting college music.

The theater parking lot was packed. Easy to see that everyone in town was trying to escape the heat. It seemed to be getting hotter as the evening wore on. I couldn’t wait to get inside a nice, dark, and cool theater with my girl. We headed down the back of the lot and there was absolutely no parking. After I waited for a few cars to come out, I saw two parking spots side by side near the front of the theater. I pulled up into the left space. Suzie handed me back the joint. I lit it and sat there trying to smoke it fast so we could get inside.

A few minutes later, this piece of shit blue Maverick pulls into the spot next to us. They skimmed up very close to the passenger side of my car. A bit too close for comfort. 4 guys, all around my age were in the car. .38 Special’s “Hold on Loosely” pounding from the speakers on the rear deck.  The occupants threw a half full Miller can out into the parking lot. “Son of a bitch, white trash!” Miller Beer and .38 Special. Add some baseball caps and huge metal belt buckles and you could have a tractor pull.’

The driver’s door of their car suddenly opened quickly and SMASHED into the passenger door of my car. Suzie and I both jumped. Then the driver squeezed his fat ass Wrangler jeans covered ass out between the two doors. Then the guy in the backseat squeezed out through the small opening as well. The driver stuck his head in my passenger window, just inches from my baby’s precious, full red lips.

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Get Ready for an Ass Kicking

“Hey, you should learn how to park” he laughed. “Fucking,  punk rocker!”

This guy was not only very clearly inebriated, but he had no taste in my choice of clothes, either. Not only that, but he definitely (by the sound of it) damaged my car. My car was far from perfect, but it was my  car and I hated people messing with it.

“Hey Fuck you! “, I blurted, jumping out of the car.

I always had more balls than brains and my 19 year old testosterone production had been in full swing over the past few months. No guy worth his testicles would let someone dent his car and then insult him in front of his girlfriend. It’s unheard of. No matter the consequences, I had to defend my honor in front of my girl.

I was ready for a fight, although at 19, I wasn’t a very tough looking opponent, I was incredibly pissed off and scared at the same time. The adrenaline in my body was making me shake, which doesn’t look good when you’re about to get your ass handed back to you by four different guys. All bigger than you.

I’m 5’11” and I was about 160 lbs. back then. Full of Irish temper I decided to strike first. I sort of connected with the driver’s face, but not really. I only clipped the side of his jaw and my hand slipped off. He pushed me into another guy and that guy threw me down on the ground. The parking lot surface was hot. The side of my face pressed down on the asphalt as I landed. Someone, (I’m not sure who), kicked me in the stomach. I was done. I wasn’t getting up. Then the ultimate insult. I got spit on. I felt it on my neck. I was so frustrated and pissed off I almost started crying. The asshats walked away towards the theater laughing and every few seconds looking back at me-and then laughing again.

During all of this commotion, Suzie had been screaming out the window. She screamed at me, she screamed at the other guys, she screamed for help, she screamed for the cops.  She screamed for everything except ice cream. She got out through the driver’s side and came to help me up.

“Dax, let’s get out here”, she said. “Let’s get you to a doctor. It looks like you’re bleeding.”

I was bleeding. My ear was bleeding. My earring had come out. A long ass dangly thing. My ear didn’t split but  it hurt just the same. My black stovepipe skinny jeans were covered in dirt. My white, black and hot pink Sex Pistols t-shirt was ripped. on the neck and there were pieces of asphalt in my cheek. That really hurt. I got my ass kicked for a whole 6 seconds and I was a mess. How embarrassing.

“I’m ok”, I told Suzie. “I’m tougher than I look”, I laughed. “I don’t need a doctor.”

I didn’t know if I needed a doctor, or not. My side hurt. I thought I might have got kicked in the ribs while I was down. I was not going to let this incident put a damper on my date. The plan had been, get into the movies by 9:00pm and then into Suzie about two hours after that. I wasn’t going to to disappoint her, or myself.

I was a little unsteady on my feet, but I was ok. More freaked out and embarrassed than anything. My mind raced for the perfect thing my body should be doing in this situation and then it thought of it.

My hand went to my zipper and pulled it down.

I know what you’re thinking. Sex at a time like this? Not quite.

Although I did reach in and pull it out. I had other intentions. I walked over to the passenger side of the shitty, blue Maverick and stuck my manhood inside. Then I pissed.

I pissed everywhere. On the dashboard, the inside of the windshield, all over the seats, on their redneck , country rock cassettes tapes, and all over the steering wheel. I drenched the inside of that car with piss. Fortunately, the events of the evening and a Budweiser or two before-hand, guaranteed me a more than adequate supply of bladder revenge. Suzie sat on the curb nearby….at first drop-jawed at my solution to the problem and then resorting to uncontrollable laughter.

I looked over at Suzie and smiled. I had lost the battle, but I won the war. I shook it off on their hood and then zipped back up.

“We’d better get the hell out of here”, Suzie said to me, suddenly concerned. “I’m not the only person who saw you take a leak in that car. Someone is gonna call the cops.”

“Ok, let’s go”, I said. “No movie tonight. What do you want to do?”

Suzie lifted up her t-shirt for a quick flash. “Are you up to this?”, she asked.

“I’ll try”, I answered.

I did try and I did succeed.

And although I never got to see the look on their fucking white trash faces, I can rest comfortably, knowing that I got just justice.

Pictured: Arsenic Arson 

Do you have a revenge story to share with us? Articles must be true, previously unpublished 
stories of true revenge. All names MUST be changed. Send your revenge to Prettywasted today!